The Uchdorf's pre-apostleship:
***6/9/04 NOTES: Devotional
1. Sister Uchtdorf
A. Ephesians 2:19 - Fellow citizens with the Saints and house of Israel
B. Sacrifices bring blessings
C. The biggest sacrifice we can make is to give up everything to the Lord.
2. Brother Uchdorf
A. Serve the Lord with all your heart, might, mind and strength.
1) Serve the way you promised to.
2) This is our opportunity to give it our all everyday
B. You are here to find, teach, baptize, and confirm. To help those young members become strong, faithful members
1) You need to influence them for good, to keep the commandments after they are baptized so they never fall away.
2)Prepare them to go to the temple - focus on the temple early - all roads lead to the temple
3) We need to be missionaries with a purpose.
4) They need to be taught by missionaries with strong testimonies and the desire to teach by the spirit
C. Teach and bear testimony espeically of things not found in other churches
1) Modern revelation - The prophet Joseph Smith
2) Book of Mormon - a second witness
3) The God head - three separate beings with one purpose
4) The Plan of Salvation
5) The Word of Wisdom
6) Temple work - through revelation
D. You have to obtain, believe, love, live the doctrine
1) Study, ponder and have questions, so you can find the answers to those questions
2) Make it yours by believing it and living it
3) Let these words sink deep into your heart, so you can teach it from your heart
4) Depend on motivation and focus to study
5) The message of the restoration is a true and valid foundation
6) You need to have the powers of heaven to teach - obedience and personal worthiness requisite
7) Be alert, exercise, shower and pray before study
E. Our purpose is to teach the message of the restored gospel in such a way that both the missionary and the investigator are led by the spirit.
1) If you want to teach from the heart, you must have something in your heart
2) If you want to teach with conviction, you must have conviction
3) If you want to teach with testimony, you must have a testimony
4) Don't overestimate the power of your eloquence and attractiveness!
F. Follow the guidance of the spirit they need to hear the simple gospel truths
*** 6/8/04 PERSONAL STUDY: Alma 17-18
A. Characteristics of a Missionary
1. waxed strong in the knowledge of truth
2. sound understanding of the gospel of Jesus Christ
3. obtained the word of Christ
4. given to much prayer and fasting
5. have the spirit of prophecy, the spirit of revelation
6. they taught with the power and authority of God
B. Alma the Younger and the sons of Mosiah did suffer - God tells them to be patient and they will be blessed
C. Ammon
1. The flocks were scattered and Ammon recovered them (like missionary work)
2. slinging stones? smiting arms? bring it on! whoo-hoo
*** June 8, 2004 JOURNAL: TUESDAY
Well I didn't accomplish much of any goals. It's way past 10:30 pm. Sister Morris and Sister Sitake (different district, same branch) leave tomorrow morning, so we were saying our goodbyes. Hard to think that will be us in a week.
Tonight we did a spotlight on Christ - so good, such strong testimonies. I'm so grateful for my district, they're the best.
13 March 2013
I had most of this typed out yesterday and never got to posting it. Grrr! It was one of those days where I had my day too, well mapped out. One thing went wrong and my day went from what I considered a fully successful day to: if you walked into my house you'd wondered if I did anything at all.
So I had planned on sharing yesterday, and am doing so today, about how I started reading the Relief Society "Daughters in My Kingdom" book on Sunday. I know we received it last year (or maybe earlier o.O) but I never made it past the first chapter. I decided that since I attend Relief Society now it would be a good idea to know the history of Relief Society. In chapter 2, Joseph Smith is quoted from section 93 of the Doctrine and Covenants. While Joseph Smith is counseling specific families, it is good counsel for me too: "First set in order thy house. ..." A light bulb clicked on in my head when I read that. So I set goals for myself to reach this week starting with Monday and cleaning the first floor. Which I did fairly well. It wasn't deep cleaning by any means, but the floors were clear of clutter and swept, the table was clean and most of the dishes were done. Yesterday was my day to focus on laundry. That plan went bust as I discovered a tiny hole in the drain hose of our washer. My yesterday's plans crashed and burned and are still unrecognizable. To add insult to injury we need a specific type of drain hose replacement for our washing machine. So, while we are figuring out the logistics of replacing the drain hose we will temporarily mend the drain hose with plumbers tape.
Was my yesterday successful? I'm not sure. If I think about things that affect my "Celestial Worthiness" the cleanliness of my house plays a lesser role to the time I spent coloring with Pwopwo, walking Lloyd to school, rocking Itasca to sleep, talking on the phone with Nakeu and having dinner (at Denny's because I didn't even get to cooking dinner) with my family. Lesser even to the time spent reading church materials and Sunday lessons. Would it have been nice to be a step closer to getting our house in order? Yes, definitely. But that must be what today is for. ... Unless God has another adventure in store for me ;)
As soon as this is posted today, it's time to put my shoulders to the wheel and push along in setting our house in order.
Showing posts with label mother. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mother. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
Monday, March 11, 2013
Bringing the Past Into the Present
Back at it. Trying to decide whether it's easier to type with one hand, or the baby in the crook of my arm ...
While at the MTC we one of the elder's in our district joked about going home and Sis. King decided we needed to watch a talk by Elder Jeffery R. Holland entitled, "Don't You Dare Go Home!"
***Elder Jeffery R. Holland: Don't You Dare Go Home
A. Don't miss a day, don't miss an hour
B. Don't live with regret
C. Serve for all 18/24 months
D. Every good blessing I have, is because I have gone on a mission
E. Savor, embrace and cherish every minute of it - it will never come again
F. Enhance, magnify, glorify and underscore yourself
G. Plan now for the stories you will tell your children
H. We can't guarantee heroic results, but every one can pledge heroic effort
I. We do our missionaries a great disservice if we expect anything less than their best, we can't expect more than your best effort
J. Obey mission rules, obedience is the first law of missionary work
K. Doctrine and Covenants 130:20-21 - the promise is in the obedience
L. Be bigger and better and bolder than you've ever been
M. Don't miss the chance to gain these blessings
N. It is His work and His glory done His way
O. It is the hardest work I've ever done
P. ADVICE
1. Teach the atonement of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, the Saviour of the world
2. We want them to have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, repent, then be baptized for the remission of sins
3. Do not take the simple doctrine for granted - We should talk more about the basic saving ordinances
4. Why isn't it easier to get baptisms? - missions have to be hard
- salvation is not a cheap experience - it wasn't meant to be easy
- If I'm going to be his missionary, how dare I ask not to get close to the anguish he felt
- Be disciples of him who did atone
- Christ's only imperfections are the one's he choose to keep, the wounds in his hands, feet and side
Q. Serve suffering (allowing) the will of the Lord from the beginning.
***June 7, 2004 JOURNAL: The Temple
I'm so glad we got to go tot he temple this morning. I felt so much better. I really missed not being able to go the the temple for the past two weeks. I'm grateful that Greg took me along with him to the temple for that month leading up leaving for the MTC. I've come to be entirely grateful for the temple. A great work goes on in the temple and I felt such a calming peace. It is truly the house of God. Overall it was a very, very good morning.
GOOD: went to the temple, did laundry
COMPANION: understanding, caring
GOALS: 4th discussion simple summary, work harder, have fun, teach 3rd discussion, lights out at 10:30pm
11 March 2013
Two months later and here I am again.
For historical purposes:
At the end of January we celebrated Alessandra's birthday. We had a great time with our family at Shakey's Pizza. It was, of course, Minnie Mouse themed. We hoped she felt special and especially loved for her birthday.
At the beginning of February, on the evening of the 5th, Itasca was born. We love him. More will be shared about his birth story and first month of life in coming blogs.
Yesterday was a great day to be at church. We were under flash flood advisory and it seemed like Heavenly Father wanted us to work to get to the goodness. Brother Patrick and Sister Lori Soma spoke in sacrament meeting on the topic of repentance. Sister Soma a shared personal story about how she stole a piece of candy and her older brother made her apology and paid her debt to the store owner. She was five-years-old when she first, truly learned the principle of repentance and about the atonement of Jesus Christ.
Lloyd shared a talk in primary about Jesus Christ is my Saviour. He talked about Enos' wrestle with the Lord. How Christ's atonement allowed for Enos' forgiveness of sins. And because Christ's atonement covered Enos' repentance, we can repent and be forgiven as well.
Nake'u and I were able to catch part of the Sunday School lesson after Lloyd's talk. We learned that the core of pride is enmity. Separating yourself from God, from those around you, from your family. etc. We are constantly reminded of the need for humility because we don't all tend toward humility. Our need for money and "worldly stuff" becomes pride when our focus changes from serving others, to uplifting ourselves in the eyes of others. Daily and constant prayer can help to keep our focus on God and humility and away from pride.
In Relief Society Sister Ilona Kaonohi taught "The Grand Destiny of the Faithful" from the Teachings of the Prophet Lorenzo Snow. She shared about how her son Jared is training and competing in track and field. In order to qualify for states in shot put he needs to throw the ball 45 feet. However, he keeps landing short of the 40 foot mark. She constantly tells Jared that he is doing all he can to train, focus and get proper form. That he needs to keep competing without giving up and the time will come when he will be able to throw the ball far enough. Sister Kaonohi also shared a Mormon Message by Elder Holland, "Good Things to Come." I liked that Elder Holland reflected on advice he would give to his younger self: "Don't you quit.... You keep trying. ... Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don't come until heaven. But for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come. It will be alright in the end. Trust God and believe in good things to come." Sister Kaonohi encouraged us to read scriptures daily, because the scriptures will nourish our souls with the hope we need to get from day to day, until that great day when the work is finished and the Lord stands with open arms to greet his good and faithful servants.
While at the MTC we one of the elder's in our district joked about going home and Sis. King decided we needed to watch a talk by Elder Jeffery R. Holland entitled, "Don't You Dare Go Home!"
***Elder Jeffery R. Holland: Don't You Dare Go Home
A. Don't miss a day, don't miss an hour
B. Don't live with regret
C. Serve for all 18/24 months
D. Every good blessing I have, is because I have gone on a mission
E. Savor, embrace and cherish every minute of it - it will never come again
F. Enhance, magnify, glorify and underscore yourself
G. Plan now for the stories you will tell your children
H. We can't guarantee heroic results, but every one can pledge heroic effort
I. We do our missionaries a great disservice if we expect anything less than their best, we can't expect more than your best effort
J. Obey mission rules, obedience is the first law of missionary work
K. Doctrine and Covenants 130:20-21 - the promise is in the obedience
L. Be bigger and better and bolder than you've ever been
M. Don't miss the chance to gain these blessings
N. It is His work and His glory done His way
O. It is the hardest work I've ever done
P. ADVICE
1. Teach the atonement of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, the Saviour of the world
2. We want them to have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, repent, then be baptized for the remission of sins
3. Do not take the simple doctrine for granted - We should talk more about the basic saving ordinances
4. Why isn't it easier to get baptisms? - missions have to be hard
- salvation is not a cheap experience - it wasn't meant to be easy
- If I'm going to be his missionary, how dare I ask not to get close to the anguish he felt
- Be disciples of him who did atone
- Christ's only imperfections are the one's he choose to keep, the wounds in his hands, feet and side
Q. Serve suffering (allowing) the will of the Lord from the beginning.
***June 7, 2004 JOURNAL: The Temple
I'm so glad we got to go tot he temple this morning. I felt so much better. I really missed not being able to go the the temple for the past two weeks. I'm grateful that Greg took me along with him to the temple for that month leading up leaving for the MTC. I've come to be entirely grateful for the temple. A great work goes on in the temple and I felt such a calming peace. It is truly the house of God. Overall it was a very, very good morning.
GOOD: went to the temple, did laundry
COMPANION: understanding, caring
GOALS: 4th discussion simple summary, work harder, have fun, teach 3rd discussion, lights out at 10:30pm
11 March 2013
Two months later and here I am again.
For historical purposes:
At the end of January we celebrated Alessandra's birthday. We had a great time with our family at Shakey's Pizza. It was, of course, Minnie Mouse themed. We hoped she felt special and especially loved for her birthday.
At the beginning of February, on the evening of the 5th, Itasca was born. We love him. More will be shared about his birth story and first month of life in coming blogs.
Yesterday was a great day to be at church. We were under flash flood advisory and it seemed like Heavenly Father wanted us to work to get to the goodness. Brother Patrick and Sister Lori Soma spoke in sacrament meeting on the topic of repentance. Sister Soma a shared personal story about how she stole a piece of candy and her older brother made her apology and paid her debt to the store owner. She was five-years-old when she first, truly learned the principle of repentance and about the atonement of Jesus Christ.
Lloyd shared a talk in primary about Jesus Christ is my Saviour. He talked about Enos' wrestle with the Lord. How Christ's atonement allowed for Enos' forgiveness of sins. And because Christ's atonement covered Enos' repentance, we can repent and be forgiven as well.
Nake'u and I were able to catch part of the Sunday School lesson after Lloyd's talk. We learned that the core of pride is enmity. Separating yourself from God, from those around you, from your family. etc. We are constantly reminded of the need for humility because we don't all tend toward humility. Our need for money and "worldly stuff" becomes pride when our focus changes from serving others, to uplifting ourselves in the eyes of others. Daily and constant prayer can help to keep our focus on God and humility and away from pride.
In Relief Society Sister Ilona Kaonohi taught "The Grand Destiny of the Faithful" from the Teachings of the Prophet Lorenzo Snow. She shared about how her son Jared is training and competing in track and field. In order to qualify for states in shot put he needs to throw the ball 45 feet. However, he keeps landing short of the 40 foot mark. She constantly tells Jared that he is doing all he can to train, focus and get proper form. That he needs to keep competing without giving up and the time will come when he will be able to throw the ball far enough. Sister Kaonohi also shared a Mormon Message by Elder Holland, "Good Things to Come." I liked that Elder Holland reflected on advice he would give to his younger self: "Don't you quit.... You keep trying. ... Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don't come until heaven. But for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come. It will be alright in the end. Trust God and believe in good things to come." Sister Kaonohi encouraged us to read scriptures daily, because the scriptures will nourish our souls with the hope we need to get from day to day, until that great day when the work is finished and the Lord stands with open arms to greet his good and faithful servants.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
This journal is becoming all about the homesickness....then there was a birthday
*** June 6, 2004 JOURNAL: Fast Sunday at the MTC
I was alright for most of the day, then my mind started to wander. I think it's because I was talking to Sis. Hansen about home, and pictures and stuff. [Sis. Hansen was assigned to the Hawaii, Honolulu Mission]
I started to feel really lonely. And I know that's just Satan trying to get to me. But I couldn't help but give in for a little while.
I began to see the vision again. Of how everything fits and why I am here on a mission for the Lord. But it's still hard. The end seems so far away and there's a lot of time in between where I don't know what's going to happen. But I trust in the Lord that everything will work out for the best. That's why I'm here. I know I am where I belong and I am doing the work that the Lord has called me to do. I am here because this is what I know I want to do. But that doesn't mean that I don't get lonely. But even when I do, I try to catch that glimpse of heaven - of where I want to be and I know I will be alright.
We watched The Testament tonight. And for the last few minutes I felt the presence of the Lord so close - and I knew I wasn't alone.
15 January 2013
I always wish my grammar was better, but I don't do anything to make it any better.
My husband is the best. It was birthday weekend and it was the best ever! I love a good surprise birthday celebration. Nakeu is so much better at surprises than I am. My face doesn't do lying well... For my first birthday together, we were engaged, and my surprise was a day trip to Hawaii island to go to the Kona temple, because I wanted to go to the temple for my birthday and the Laie temple was closed for cleaning. The next year it was a surprise weekend stay (we were married) at the Marriott Beach Club, bags packed when I picked him up from work. In 2009 we stayed at the Ihilani with Lloyd. In 2010, Nakeu let me throw my own birthday party with friends and food at the house. In 2011 I wanted to go to CPK with friends and family and eat their butter cake with ice cream ... oh, so YUMMY! In 2012 we had a surprise weekend stayed at the Hilton Waikoloa on Hawaii Island. We <3 that hotel, with the trains and the boats and the pools. This year was a complete surprise dinner at Bucca De Beppo with friends and family. The food was soooo yummy! I had a great time. Thank you Beb.
On Sunday I was released from teaching in primary. I could feel the longing eyes of the other primary workers as I dropped Lloyd off at primary (of which there were no tears ...) I was prepared to teach a lesson on how Heavenly Father has a Body and was put into a Gospel Doctrine lesson on how Jesus Christ is the Saviour of the World. Luckily our teacher was AWESOME! And even with as little preparation as I didn't read any of the lesson, I felt inspired and edified and my mind was opened to new thoughts and insights. Not to mention that I got to got to Relief Society. I didn't know how much I missed going to Relief Society, after a four year absence. I did miss teaching the little'uns, though.
What a great weekend.
I was alright for most of the day, then my mind started to wander. I think it's because I was talking to Sis. Hansen about home, and pictures and stuff. [Sis. Hansen was assigned to the Hawaii, Honolulu Mission]
I started to feel really lonely. And I know that's just Satan trying to get to me. But I couldn't help but give in for a little while.
I began to see the vision again. Of how everything fits and why I am here on a mission for the Lord. But it's still hard. The end seems so far away and there's a lot of time in between where I don't know what's going to happen. But I trust in the Lord that everything will work out for the best. That's why I'm here. I know I am where I belong and I am doing the work that the Lord has called me to do. I am here because this is what I know I want to do. But that doesn't mean that I don't get lonely. But even when I do, I try to catch that glimpse of heaven - of where I want to be and I know I will be alright.
We watched The Testament tonight. And for the last few minutes I felt the presence of the Lord so close - and I knew I wasn't alone.
15 January 2013
I always wish my grammar was better, but I don't do anything to make it any better.
My husband is the best. It was birthday weekend and it was the best ever! I love a good surprise birthday celebration. Nakeu is so much better at surprises than I am. My face doesn't do lying well... For my first birthday together, we were engaged, and my surprise was a day trip to Hawaii island to go to the Kona temple, because I wanted to go to the temple for my birthday and the Laie temple was closed for cleaning. The next year it was a surprise weekend stay (we were married) at the Marriott Beach Club, bags packed when I picked him up from work. In 2009 we stayed at the Ihilani with Lloyd. In 2010, Nakeu let me throw my own birthday party with friends and food at the house. In 2011 I wanted to go to CPK with friends and family and eat their butter cake with ice cream ... oh, so YUMMY! In 2012 we had a surprise weekend stayed at the Hilton Waikoloa on Hawaii Island. We <3 that hotel, with the trains and the boats and the pools. This year was a complete surprise dinner at Bucca De Beppo with friends and family. The food was soooo yummy! I had a great time. Thank you Beb.
On Sunday I was released from teaching in primary. I could feel the longing eyes of the other primary workers as I dropped Lloyd off at primary (of which there were no tears ...) I was prepared to teach a lesson on how Heavenly Father has a Body and was put into a Gospel Doctrine lesson on how Jesus Christ is the Saviour of the World. Luckily our teacher was AWESOME! And even with as little preparation as I didn't read any of the lesson, I felt inspired and edified and my mind was opened to new thoughts and insights. Not to mention that I got to got to Relief Society. I didn't know how much I missed going to Relief Society, after a four year absence. I did miss teaching the little'uns, though.
What a great weekend.
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
2013
***6/4/2004 MEETING NOTES: How to Begin Teaching
1. Gaining trust through the spirit: The unique thing about our message it it's either true or it's not - will only know through prayer
2. Be gentle, sincere honest, enthusiastic and positive
a. who you are
b. why you are there
c. what the message can do for them
***June 4, 2004 JOURNAL: We were humbled
We did the 2nd discussion twice this morning at the resource center. Good experience. We were taped and should have got feed back but Bro. Robinson wasn't that worried about Sis. Wagstaff and me.
Part way through our MDT, (missionary directed time) Elder Wright, was trying to get us to convince him, about why he (posing as an investigator) should change his life. After some people tried, I told him to ask Elder Duthrie (a convert of just over a year at the time.) And we were humbled. He reminded us that it's the spirit that converts, not us, and that we should remember the basic doctrine and not get so caught up in deep doctrine.
GOOD: taught the 2nd and 3rd discussion, played volleyball
COMPANION: teaches by the spirit, patient, willing to learn, humble, fun
GOALS: obtain principles in 4th discussion, start looking over 5th/6th discussion, smile
1 January 2013
Sneaking one in here before the day ends. Going back to life as normal after week of fun is generally depressing. That will be for tomorrow.
Up until a couple of years ago, we were allowed to play with fireworks in Hawaii. The past two years have been boring on New Year's Eve. There are folk that go out and buy permits to purchase and burn legal firecrackers to pop. Then there are the one's who get the illegal stuff and burn them for us all to enjoy. The babies didn't make it until midnight, and I almost didn't make it either. But we did spend New Year's Eve and New Year's Day together with our family. That is what mattered to me the most. The food was great! We grilled meat and sausages and had some soup and baked beans for New Year's Eve. When we played tetris on xbox and watched movies and tv to keep ourselves awake between short naps. We have a tradition in the Smith family of local Hawaiian food for New Year's Day. We prepared, wrapped and cooked pork and pork and fish laulau. Nakeu made squid luau, kalua pig and lomi salmon and also boiled peanuts. Mommy-Daddy have a sushi tradition, so they brought over rolled and cone sushi. Jorell and Leilani brought some lumpia. Oh, so yummy!
1. Gaining trust through the spirit: The unique thing about our message it it's either true or it's not - will only know through prayer
2. Be gentle, sincere honest, enthusiastic and positive
a. who you are
b. why you are there
c. what the message can do for them
***June 4, 2004 JOURNAL: We were humbled
We did the 2nd discussion twice this morning at the resource center. Good experience. We were taped and should have got feed back but Bro. Robinson wasn't that worried about Sis. Wagstaff and me.
Part way through our MDT, (missionary directed time) Elder Wright, was trying to get us to convince him, about why he (posing as an investigator) should change his life. After some people tried, I told him to ask Elder Duthrie (a convert of just over a year at the time.) And we were humbled. He reminded us that it's the spirit that converts, not us, and that we should remember the basic doctrine and not get so caught up in deep doctrine.
GOOD: taught the 2nd and 3rd discussion, played volleyball
COMPANION: teaches by the spirit, patient, willing to learn, humble, fun
GOALS: obtain principles in 4th discussion, start looking over 5th/6th discussion, smile
1 January 2013
Sneaking one in here before the day ends. Going back to life as normal after week of fun is generally depressing. That will be for tomorrow.
Up until a couple of years ago, we were allowed to play with fireworks in Hawaii. The past two years have been boring on New Year's Eve. There are folk that go out and buy permits to purchase and burn legal firecrackers to pop. Then there are the one's who get the illegal stuff and burn them for us all to enjoy. The babies didn't make it until midnight, and I almost didn't make it either. But we did spend New Year's Eve and New Year's Day together with our family. That is what mattered to me the most. The food was great! We grilled meat and sausages and had some soup and baked beans for New Year's Eve. When we played tetris on xbox and watched movies and tv to keep ourselves awake between short naps. We have a tradition in the Smith family of local Hawaiian food for New Year's Day. We prepared, wrapped and cooked pork and pork and fish laulau. Nakeu made squid luau, kalua pig and lomi salmon and also boiled peanuts. Mommy-Daddy have a sushi tradition, so they brought over rolled and cone sushi. Jorell and Leilani brought some lumpia. Oh, so yummy!
Monday, December 31, 2012
Back to it then
For some reason I had two journal entries this day ...
***6/03/04 JOURNAL: ATTRIBUTES OF CHRIST - Patience
I know I've been given lots of opportunities this week that have really tested my patience. I don't feel like I'm doing very well though, because I still get really angry and although it's not an outward aggression it's still there. And I know I can't feel the spirit until I am no longer angry.
***June 3, 2004 JOURNAL: THURSDAY
I was pretty upset this morning. A lot of stuff piled on and my companion was late getting ready so we missed breakfast. But I realized I had to get over that in order to be able to learn and to teach. We taught the 1st discussion to some volunteers this morning. That was nice. definitely got some feedback only possible through converts, because they've been there before. We also went to the Evaluation center. We met with a Bro. Wagstaff. He was really helpful because we were working on two specific goals: 1) making bold, direct commitments and 2) creating more of a discussion environment by asking questions. He taught us how to ask questions on different levels, starting from basic and moving through to more in-depth questions.
Got to play volleyball. That was definitely a good release of energy.
30 December 2012
Few things compare to taking a month long, unannounced hiatus then just as unexpectedly jumping back into things.
December has been a good month for us. I had not given up on this blog. I just needed to get settled into some changes before portioning out time to blogging again.
Toward the end of November we found out that Lloyd received a scholarship (Mahalo Kealii Pauahi!) which would allow him to attend preschool from January 2013 - June 2013. These scholarships are awarded twice a year, and I missed the first round deadline. There were three available openings at the Seagull School I wanted him to attend located on the Kapolei Elementary School Campus. We were the second family to put in a deposit in an attempt to hold a spot until January when his scholarship would be active. Nakeu and I were both concerned that, that spot may not be available in January as the director of the school was unable to to tell me firmly if they would hold his spot, with a deposit, in the case of other families starting full-time in December. After a short deliberation and feeling we could afford it for one month, Nakeu and I decided to start Lloyd at the beginning of December, part-time, to help him get adjusted and at a slightly cheaper rate. Our mornings are so quiet without him! I can't imagine what it will be like on Wednesday when he'll be gone the whole of the day! :(
I had some Christmas things I wanted to do. I did, on a smaller than I thought, scale make Christmas binders for the babies with coloring pages for songs and stories. I had too many pages planned and not enough binder space. So the project got scaled back, but was still successfully completed! I have always wanted to make chocolates to give out at Christmas time. In November I found (thank you Pinterest) some easy chocolate recipes to test. Again this project was scaled back, but it was successfully completed in that I was able to make and give out some chocolate boxes. The inside of the house was far more decorated, although scaled back from my glorious visions, than in years past. Nakeu dressed up as Santa. We made cookies for Santa and had a great Christmas Eve dinner where we formally dressed up the babies because Nakeu and I were too tired from getting dinner and babies and house ready for Christmas Eve to consider dressing up for a formal dinner.
If you noticed the theme of this year was to scale things back. But the beauty is that we still had a great Christmas! Not everything needs to get done and not everything needs to be big in order to be special and enjoyable. And everyone was/is still happy.
One last memory I want to keep. Early in December, in a phone conversation, Nakeu suggested purchasing only one gift for each other this year. Then during "Week of Fun" (yes, from Christmas to New Year's when we are both off from work, with the exception of Nakeu who has to work tomorrow) if we find things we want to buy or other things that we need, we could purchase it then. I had to make sure that Nakeu meant he also would only buy me one gift and I would buy him only one gift. We agreed, which meant I needed to figure out how he would, if he were to bend the rules. So on Christmas day we both broke the rules slightly, but the idea was there where we each had one gift from each other to open. It was a great idea! The next day the babies were with grandparents so we walked around Ross and picked up a few things that we liked and called it good. Scaling back.
This year is a lesson in less is definitely more!
***6/03/04 JOURNAL: ATTRIBUTES OF CHRIST - Patience
I know I've been given lots of opportunities this week that have really tested my patience. I don't feel like I'm doing very well though, because I still get really angry and although it's not an outward aggression it's still there. And I know I can't feel the spirit until I am no longer angry.
***June 3, 2004 JOURNAL: THURSDAY
I was pretty upset this morning. A lot of stuff piled on and my companion was late getting ready so we missed breakfast. But I realized I had to get over that in order to be able to learn and to teach. We taught the 1st discussion to some volunteers this morning. That was nice. definitely got some feedback only possible through converts, because they've been there before. We also went to the Evaluation center. We met with a Bro. Wagstaff. He was really helpful because we were working on two specific goals: 1) making bold, direct commitments and 2) creating more of a discussion environment by asking questions. He taught us how to ask questions on different levels, starting from basic and moving through to more in-depth questions.
Got to play volleyball. That was definitely a good release of energy.
30 December 2012
Few things compare to taking a month long, unannounced hiatus then just as unexpectedly jumping back into things.
December has been a good month for us. I had not given up on this blog. I just needed to get settled into some changes before portioning out time to blogging again.
Toward the end of November we found out that Lloyd received a scholarship (Mahalo Kealii Pauahi!) which would allow him to attend preschool from January 2013 - June 2013. These scholarships are awarded twice a year, and I missed the first round deadline. There were three available openings at the Seagull School I wanted him to attend located on the Kapolei Elementary School Campus. We were the second family to put in a deposit in an attempt to hold a spot until January when his scholarship would be active. Nakeu and I were both concerned that, that spot may not be available in January as the director of the school was unable to to tell me firmly if they would hold his spot, with a deposit, in the case of other families starting full-time in December. After a short deliberation and feeling we could afford it for one month, Nakeu and I decided to start Lloyd at the beginning of December, part-time, to help him get adjusted and at a slightly cheaper rate. Our mornings are so quiet without him! I can't imagine what it will be like on Wednesday when he'll be gone the whole of the day! :(
I had some Christmas things I wanted to do. I did, on a smaller than I thought, scale make Christmas binders for the babies with coloring pages for songs and stories. I had too many pages planned and not enough binder space. So the project got scaled back, but was still successfully completed! I have always wanted to make chocolates to give out at Christmas time. In November I found (thank you Pinterest) some easy chocolate recipes to test. Again this project was scaled back, but it was successfully completed in that I was able to make and give out some chocolate boxes. The inside of the house was far more decorated, although scaled back from my glorious visions, than in years past. Nakeu dressed up as Santa. We made cookies for Santa and had a great Christmas Eve dinner where we formally dressed up the babies because Nakeu and I were too tired from getting dinner and babies and house ready for Christmas Eve to consider dressing up for a formal dinner.
If you noticed the theme of this year was to scale things back. But the beauty is that we still had a great Christmas! Not everything needs to get done and not everything needs to be big in order to be special and enjoyable. And everyone was/is still happy.
One last memory I want to keep. Early in December, in a phone conversation, Nakeu suggested purchasing only one gift for each other this year. Then during "Week of Fun" (yes, from Christmas to New Year's when we are both off from work, with the exception of Nakeu who has to work tomorrow) if we find things we want to buy or other things that we need, we could purchase it then. I had to make sure that Nakeu meant he also would only buy me one gift and I would buy him only one gift. We agreed, which meant I needed to figure out how he would, if he were to bend the rules. So on Christmas day we both broke the rules slightly, but the idea was there where we each had one gift from each other to open. It was a great idea! The next day the babies were with grandparents so we walked around Ross and picked up a few things that we liked and called it good. Scaling back.
This year is a lesson in less is definitely more!
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Happenings of the Day
***6/2/2004 MEETING NOTES: The Atonement of Jesus Christ - Bro. Dollar
1. 2Nephi4:15 - The atonement: So sacred and special, it is spiritual learning
2. Why should we focus on the atonement? Elder Holland:
A. The atonement was/is a voluntary sacrifice for all pain, sickness, affliction, and sin because Christ loves us.
B. The atonement is the compassionate foundation
C. Every truth a missionary teaches is an appendage to the central message that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, the Holy Messiah, the promised one, the Saviour and the Redeemer
1) The point of the restoration is so we can have access to the atonement again
2) Sacrifice, for us, is necessary to understand Christ's sacrifice
3. What does it mean to have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ?
A. To believe the He is
B. To live by His teachings
C. Understanding that it is only possible through Christ's grace
D. The first act of faith is not waiting for Him, but asking Him
4. The importance of the atonement:
A. It is the repeating message of the Book of Mormon: Have faith, repent, be baptized, the Holy Ghost
B. It is the ever present power to call upon in everyday life. Whenever we are racked or harrowed up or tormented by guilt or burden, He can heal us. Pres. Packer.
***June 2, 2004 JOURNAL: One Week In
So it's been a week. It's true that the days seem like weeks and the weeks seem like days.
Got to teach the 1st discussion today. Such an awesome experience. The spirit was so strong. We started by singing a song. <GOOD IDEA: SIS. WAGSTAFF> That was good for us. We were a little discouraged after trying to teach Bro. Robinson.
Feeling kind of down today. I don't know why. Homesick again, I guess.
GOOD: Sang songs, taught 1st discussion
COMPANION: got stitches twice, dad flies an airplane
GOALS: Smile, have a good day
28 November 2012
The babies woke up and decided they wanted to wear jackets today. 60 degree weather in Hawaii = jackets for babies.
We are still waiting patiently for our pictures to come in from Olan Mills. I am still convinced that our pictures were involved in the unfortunate 140 car crash that happened in Texas over the Thanksgiving holiday. It is still early. The projected arrival date for our pictures is 10 Dec 2012. But the lady at the picture place got my hopes up and excited because she mentioned they've been experiencing quicker turn around times, like under a week. Uh. Patience.
Cleaning up the house this week. Thankfully, Nake'u was home all of the Thanksgiving Holiday. That really helped to keep the house clean. Now I'm focused on upstairs. ... uh. No one likes cleaning upstairs. Probably because it's more utility than anything else. We are the only ones that come upstairs. So if it's a little more lived-in than downstairs, no one really knows. But, I still have this obsession with an entirely clean home. Most likely a result of too much tv. Because you could never predict when a random television (or feevee if you are Pwopwo) crew will show up at your home, welcome themselves in and tell you, your house is a mess or that you are a hoarder.
It is not even December yet and we may well be the last ones to put up our outdoor Christmas decorations. We got our tree on Black Friday, as usual and used the first Family Home Evening night there after to decorate our tree. But of the seven visible homes in our cul-de-sac, we are one of two that haven't put up our outdoor decorations yet! It's not even DECEMBER! We'll catch up. Probably in December, when outdoor decorations should be put up.
Lloyd already asks me if it's Christmas every morning when he wakes up. I have decided against doing an Advent count-down for the babies. It was a ton of work last year and we didn't make it out of the first week. This year we'll plan daily activities. One thing I want to do and have been working on is making coloring pages of Christmas songs, so we can learn and sing together. That will be fun.
1. 2Nephi4:15 - The atonement: So sacred and special, it is spiritual learning
2. Why should we focus on the atonement? Elder Holland:
A. The atonement was/is a voluntary sacrifice for all pain, sickness, affliction, and sin because Christ loves us.
B. The atonement is the compassionate foundation
C. Every truth a missionary teaches is an appendage to the central message that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, the Holy Messiah, the promised one, the Saviour and the Redeemer
1) The point of the restoration is so we can have access to the atonement again
2) Sacrifice, for us, is necessary to understand Christ's sacrifice
3. What does it mean to have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ?
A. To believe the He is
B. To live by His teachings
C. Understanding that it is only possible through Christ's grace
D. The first act of faith is not waiting for Him, but asking Him
4. The importance of the atonement:
A. It is the repeating message of the Book of Mormon: Have faith, repent, be baptized, the Holy Ghost
B. It is the ever present power to call upon in everyday life. Whenever we are racked or harrowed up or tormented by guilt or burden, He can heal us. Pres. Packer.
***June 2, 2004 JOURNAL: One Week In
So it's been a week. It's true that the days seem like weeks and the weeks seem like days.
Got to teach the 1st discussion today. Such an awesome experience. The spirit was so strong. We started by singing a song. <GOOD IDEA: SIS. WAGSTAFF> That was good for us. We were a little discouraged after trying to teach Bro. Robinson.
Feeling kind of down today. I don't know why. Homesick again, I guess.
GOOD: Sang songs, taught 1st discussion
COMPANION: got stitches twice, dad flies an airplane
GOALS: Smile, have a good day
28 November 2012
The babies woke up and decided they wanted to wear jackets today. 60 degree weather in Hawaii = jackets for babies.
We are still waiting patiently for our pictures to come in from Olan Mills. I am still convinced that our pictures were involved in the unfortunate 140 car crash that happened in Texas over the Thanksgiving holiday. It is still early. The projected arrival date for our pictures is 10 Dec 2012. But the lady at the picture place got my hopes up and excited because she mentioned they've been experiencing quicker turn around times, like under a week. Uh. Patience.
Cleaning up the house this week. Thankfully, Nake'u was home all of the Thanksgiving Holiday. That really helped to keep the house clean. Now I'm focused on upstairs. ... uh. No one likes cleaning upstairs. Probably because it's more utility than anything else. We are the only ones that come upstairs. So if it's a little more lived-in than downstairs, no one really knows. But, I still have this obsession with an entirely clean home. Most likely a result of too much tv. Because you could never predict when a random television (or feevee if you are Pwopwo) crew will show up at your home, welcome themselves in and tell you, your house is a mess or that you are a hoarder.
It is not even December yet and we may well be the last ones to put up our outdoor Christmas decorations. We got our tree on Black Friday, as usual and used the first Family Home Evening night there after to decorate our tree. But of the seven visible homes in our cul-de-sac, we are one of two that haven't put up our outdoor decorations yet! It's not even DECEMBER! We'll catch up. Probably in December, when outdoor decorations should be put up.
Lloyd already asks me if it's Christmas every morning when he wakes up. I have decided against doing an Advent count-down for the babies. It was a ton of work last year and we didn't make it out of the first week. This year we'll plan daily activities. One thing I want to do and have been working on is making coloring pages of Christmas songs, so we can learn and sing together. That will be fun.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
28 Days
***6/1/2004 MEETING NOTES: Teaching and Finding by the Spirit - Bro. Nelson
1. Without the spirit you will never succeed regardless of your talent and ability
A. You are not the teacher
B. The spirit is the teacher, the Lord is preparing people
2. How do I prepare to teach by the spirit? Become the Lord's favorite pen
A. Not my message, the Lord's message
B. the Lords work, in His way, on His timetable, without back talk
C. Always full of ink (scriptural knowledge, doctrine ...)
D. Be who I am and grow into what He wants me to become
E. If I am prepared, it will happen
3. Finding
A. Work with members, teach in member's homes
B. Missionaries "fishing lines" should be in the water the moment they leave the house
***6/1/2004 DEVOTIONAL NOTES OF NOTE: Elder Merril J. Oakes
1. Don't under estimate what the spirit can do.
2. Spencer W. Kimball: “If you could only see the vision I have. I wish I had your bodies to do this work. I would run from house to house telling everyone of the gospel, and after I lost strength to run I would begin to walk, and after I collapsed from walking, I would begin to crawl, and after my knees were so bloody that I could not use them I would use my arms to drag myself, and once my muscle in my body was gone I would begin to yell…oh, only if you could see the vision as I have.”
3. Never be afraid to share the gospel
4. Live so that the spirit of the Lord can be with you
***June 1, 2004 JOURNAL: So Good or No Good? Sooo-- Good!
Good day!
We went to the referral center again. I really appreciate that place and the opportunity it provides. I got to talk to two people today, would've been more but my phone was being funny :(.
One lady wanted a Finding Faith in Christ video, and she would allow missionaries to deliver it. She just recently had a hear attack, in addition to being diabetic. She is home on disability and wanted to know more about Christ. I felt prompted to do two things 1) teach her about asking for a priesthood blessing and 2) have her read 3Nephi11.
The second caller was a man and he also wanted a Finding Faith in Christ video. I was so impressed that he would call because he wanted his kids to know about Jesus Christ. I really wanted to lay out the families can be together forever plan for him, but, I felt like I shouldn't. But, I know that he is going to check out the website, so hopefully he'll get something out if it.
We heart attacked two doors tonight - the sisters in our branch. It was really funny because the other sisters had the same idea at the same time.
GOOD: Outlined Disc. 2, Service this morning
COMPANION: helpful, fun
GOALS: help new missionaries (especially sisters) feel welcome tomorrow.
27 November 2012
According to my count down there are 28 days left until Christmas! Our house is just busting with excitement. Last night we decorated the Christmas tree. In the very true words of Nake'u, it looks like Christmas exploded all over the tree. The babies had real fun getting ornaments and putting them up on the tree.
1. Without the spirit you will never succeed regardless of your talent and ability
A. You are not the teacher
B. The spirit is the teacher, the Lord is preparing people
2. How do I prepare to teach by the spirit? Become the Lord's favorite pen
A. Not my message, the Lord's message
B. the Lords work, in His way, on His timetable, without back talk
C. Always full of ink (scriptural knowledge, doctrine ...)
D. Be who I am and grow into what He wants me to become
E. If I am prepared, it will happen
3. Finding
A. Work with members, teach in member's homes
B. Missionaries "fishing lines" should be in the water the moment they leave the house
***6/1/2004 DEVOTIONAL NOTES OF NOTE: Elder Merril J. Oakes
1. Don't under estimate what the spirit can do.
2. Spencer W. Kimball: “If you could only see the vision I have. I wish I had your bodies to do this work. I would run from house to house telling everyone of the gospel, and after I lost strength to run I would begin to walk, and after I collapsed from walking, I would begin to crawl, and after my knees were so bloody that I could not use them I would use my arms to drag myself, and once my muscle in my body was gone I would begin to yell…oh, only if you could see the vision as I have.”
3. Never be afraid to share the gospel
4. Live so that the spirit of the Lord can be with you
***June 1, 2004 JOURNAL: So Good or No Good? Sooo-- Good!
Good day!
We went to the referral center again. I really appreciate that place and the opportunity it provides. I got to talk to two people today, would've been more but my phone was being funny :(.
One lady wanted a Finding Faith in Christ video, and she would allow missionaries to deliver it. She just recently had a hear attack, in addition to being diabetic. She is home on disability and wanted to know more about Christ. I felt prompted to do two things 1) teach her about asking for a priesthood blessing and 2) have her read 3Nephi11.
The second caller was a man and he also wanted a Finding Faith in Christ video. I was so impressed that he would call because he wanted his kids to know about Jesus Christ. I really wanted to lay out the families can be together forever plan for him, but, I felt like I shouldn't. But, I know that he is going to check out the website, so hopefully he'll get something out if it.
We heart attacked two doors tonight - the sisters in our branch. It was really funny because the other sisters had the same idea at the same time.
GOOD: Outlined Disc. 2, Service this morning
COMPANION: helpful, fun
GOALS: help new missionaries (especially sisters) feel welcome tomorrow.
27 November 2012
According to my count down there are 28 days left until Christmas! Our house is just busting with excitement. Last night we decorated the Christmas tree. In the very true words of Nake'u, it looks like Christmas exploded all over the tree. The babies had real fun getting ornaments and putting them up on the tree.
Friday, November 16, 2012
MTC day two
***5/27/2004 JOURNAL QUOTE: Pres. Ezra Taft Benson
"I have a vision of thousands of missionaries going into the mission field with hundreds of passages memorized from the Book of Mormon so that they might feed the needs of a spiritually famished world."
*** May 27, 2004 JOURNAL: Day Two
The workings of the spirit are amazing here.
I feel so blessed.
Our district is so great. The Elders really treat Sis. Wagstaff and me with a lot of respect. It's nice that our group is growing together. It makes it a lot easier for class discussion and for the spirit to be present there. I've found a great desire to know everything I possibly can about this gospel. It know it's true. I'm so very grateful for our teachers, Sis. King and Bro. Robinson. They are so supportive and knowledgeable. So much good! So much to write, but so little words.
I know the gospel of Jesus Christ is true. I know that it was restored its fullness and that is what we have on the earth today. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet and that he was chosen to to help the work of the Lord. I know that among other things, Joseph Smith, restored the power of the priesthood and it is with that authority that the church is operated and directed today.
GOOD: got to some classes on time, bore testimony twice, awesome district.
COMPANION: humble, not judgmental, art/photo major, gracious
GOALS FOR TOMORROW: Take every opportunity to learn by the spirit, bear testimony, patience, love, smile, talk to district.
16 November 2012
On growing up. It's interesting that each day I spend with my kids the more like a responsible adult I feel. Especially when it comes to getting things done for them. I mean, yes, they will look cute in whatever outfit I buy for them or playing with a new toy. What I'm talking about is getting paperwork done and getting them signed up for activities. Lloyd was recently awarded a scholarship to attend preschool. Yesterday we were getting things set up with the school so he can start attending soon. Nake'u and I have wanted Lloyd to attend preschool for some time, but financially it wasn't something we could afford on our own right now. And I think, in my heart of hearts, I didn't want Lloyd to be old enough for preschool. But, I know all my denial about Lloyd's age will only hinder his progress if I don't start letting go more and more. I knew from the day he was born that that was the last day he was going to belong only to Nake'u and me. I knew, consciencely that each day my task would be to give him more and more independence until the day he moves out of the house and on with his life. Working on all the paperwork that needs to get done and an additional doctor's appointment that needed to be scheduled makes it more and more real that my little baby boy that we brought home four years ago is truly growing into a handsome young man, intelligent and respectable.
On being sick. Last week I blogged about holding my sick girl. Not long thereafter I got whatever the babies had. Now, a week later, I am still dealing with this cold. It's crazy. I don't like feeling sick. I have always believed that catching a cold was Heavenly Father's way of telling me I need to take some time and slow down a bit. But, I don't like that! Today has been a recoup day from all of yesterday's errands and dinner with the missionaries, through which I allowed myself to be on my feet almost all day. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if I weren't also pregnant and keeping myself off of more medications than I would have kept away from myself usually. I feel so lazy, being in bed most of the day and looking around the house and feeling unaccomplished.
"I have a vision of thousands of missionaries going into the mission field with hundreds of passages memorized from the Book of Mormon so that they might feed the needs of a spiritually famished world."
*** May 27, 2004 JOURNAL: Day Two
The workings of the spirit are amazing here.
I feel so blessed.
Our district is so great. The Elders really treat Sis. Wagstaff and me with a lot of respect. It's nice that our group is growing together. It makes it a lot easier for class discussion and for the spirit to be present there. I've found a great desire to know everything I possibly can about this gospel. It know it's true. I'm so very grateful for our teachers, Sis. King and Bro. Robinson. They are so supportive and knowledgeable. So much good! So much to write, but so little words.
I know the gospel of Jesus Christ is true. I know that it was restored its fullness and that is what we have on the earth today. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet and that he was chosen to to help the work of the Lord. I know that among other things, Joseph Smith, restored the power of the priesthood and it is with that authority that the church is operated and directed today.
GOOD: got to some classes on time, bore testimony twice, awesome district.
COMPANION: humble, not judgmental, art/photo major, gracious
GOALS FOR TOMORROW: Take every opportunity to learn by the spirit, bear testimony, patience, love, smile, talk to district.
16 November 2012
On growing up. It's interesting that each day I spend with my kids the more like a responsible adult I feel. Especially when it comes to getting things done for them. I mean, yes, they will look cute in whatever outfit I buy for them or playing with a new toy. What I'm talking about is getting paperwork done and getting them signed up for activities. Lloyd was recently awarded a scholarship to attend preschool. Yesterday we were getting things set up with the school so he can start attending soon. Nake'u and I have wanted Lloyd to attend preschool for some time, but financially it wasn't something we could afford on our own right now. And I think, in my heart of hearts, I didn't want Lloyd to be old enough for preschool. But, I know all my denial about Lloyd's age will only hinder his progress if I don't start letting go more and more. I knew from the day he was born that that was the last day he was going to belong only to Nake'u and me. I knew, consciencely that each day my task would be to give him more and more independence until the day he moves out of the house and on with his life. Working on all the paperwork that needs to get done and an additional doctor's appointment that needed to be scheduled makes it more and more real that my little baby boy that we brought home four years ago is truly growing into a handsome young man, intelligent and respectable.
On being sick. Last week I blogged about holding my sick girl. Not long thereafter I got whatever the babies had. Now, a week later, I am still dealing with this cold. It's crazy. I don't like feeling sick. I have always believed that catching a cold was Heavenly Father's way of telling me I need to take some time and slow down a bit. But, I don't like that! Today has been a recoup day from all of yesterday's errands and dinner with the missionaries, through which I allowed myself to be on my feet almost all day. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if I weren't also pregnant and keeping myself off of more medications than I would have kept away from myself usually. I feel so lazy, being in bed most of the day and looking around the house and feeling unaccomplished.
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
First day in the MTC
We made it to the MTC!
***May 26, 2004 JOURNAL: First Day In
I didn't cry.
Talked to mom yesterday/last night. Normal stuff.
Talked to dad after waiting at the airport for four hours. Yeah, they were late.
The MTC is alright. We haven't really done anything yet so we'll see how it goes tomorrow.
GOOD: helped my companion, talked to people at dinner, tried to be on time, played piano, bore testimony
COMPANION: Sister Wagstaff: Six of nine in her family. From Heber City, Utah. Likes tennis. Likes being near the lake in her town. Has wanted to go on a mission for a few years. Has been to the temple once. Has a testimony of the gospel. I'm grateful to have been blessed with such an easy going companion. I know that as we spend more time together we will help each other to learn more of the gospel and come to love one another.
GOALS FOR TOMORROW: get to activities on time, bear testimony, smile, talk to people in our district.
14 November 2012
Prior to arriving at the MTC I was picked up from the airport by my mom's sister, Aunty Elsalyn. I had a few hours' wait at the SLC airport, which we will attribute to God and His Orchestration. While waiting I was able to observe a small family gathering together, maybe 12 people. They had balloons and welcome home signs. I remember watching them wait with excited anticipation. I remember seeing the sister missionary as she was reunited with her family after , what I imagine to have been a successful 18-months of service. It suddenly felt like such a short amount of time. I mean, here I entering the MTC and soon I would be home. I wanted that same look of success and satisfaction that I saw on her.
The weather is starting to cool off bit in the early mornings, which makes for cuddle weather. Today we'll be tackling the cleaning up the house more. Having the babies sort out toys that we can sell or donate to make room for new stuff that they will be getting in the coming months. Still so, so excited about Christmas. Scheduling picture taking, ordering Christmas greetings and sending them out. :)
***May 26, 2004 JOURNAL: First Day In
I didn't cry.
Talked to mom yesterday/last night. Normal stuff.
Talked to dad after waiting at the airport for four hours. Yeah, they were late.
The MTC is alright. We haven't really done anything yet so we'll see how it goes tomorrow.
GOOD: helped my companion, talked to people at dinner, tried to be on time, played piano, bore testimony
COMPANION: Sister Wagstaff: Six of nine in her family. From Heber City, Utah. Likes tennis. Likes being near the lake in her town. Has wanted to go on a mission for a few years. Has been to the temple once. Has a testimony of the gospel. I'm grateful to have been blessed with such an easy going companion. I know that as we spend more time together we will help each other to learn more of the gospel and come to love one another.
GOALS FOR TOMORROW: get to activities on time, bear testimony, smile, talk to people in our district.
14 November 2012
Prior to arriving at the MTC I was picked up from the airport by my mom's sister, Aunty Elsalyn. I had a few hours' wait at the SLC airport, which we will attribute to God and His Orchestration. While waiting I was able to observe a small family gathering together, maybe 12 people. They had balloons and welcome home signs. I remember watching them wait with excited anticipation. I remember seeing the sister missionary as she was reunited with her family after , what I imagine to have been a successful 18-months of service. It suddenly felt like such a short amount of time. I mean, here I entering the MTC and soon I would be home. I wanted that same look of success and satisfaction that I saw on her.
The weather is starting to cool off bit in the early mornings, which makes for cuddle weather. Today we'll be tackling the cleaning up the house more. Having the babies sort out toys that we can sell or donate to make room for new stuff that they will be getting in the coming months. Still so, so excited about Christmas. Scheduling picture taking, ordering Christmas greetings and sending them out. :)
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
On My Way to the MTC
***May 23, 2004 JOURNAL: Last Night Here
***May 25, 2004 JOURNAL:From San Francisco
I didn't cry at the airport. I thought I would, but I guess because I didn't hug anyone, outside of my family, there was less of an emotional goodbye, or because I've been saying goodbye to people for the past two weeks. I'm almost surprised at how alright I am, maybe it just hasn't "sunk-in"yet.
Besides my own family, Greg Sessions and two others also came to see me off. I have gained a great appreciation for Greg. Especially for his spirit and his counsel. When he told he some of his fears, I emailed him my favorite talk by Sheri Dew about seeing the "Big Finish." He returned the favor of sorts at the airport. He gave me a talk by Elder Packer (The Candle of the Lord) and a letter of counsel to never settle for less than I deserve.
The plane is about to board and I'm still not excited, like I think should be. I know I have work to do. I know that work can and will only be accomplished with the help of and by the direction of the Lord. I am ready to work. I am ready to learn and to grow and to help those around me in anyway I can. I am as ready as I will ever be. I look forward to the experiences both good and bad that lay before me. I know that the spirit of the Lord is with me and I am not afraid. We'll see how long that lasts.
13 November 2012
I don't know if I was ever really excited to about getting to the MTC or even to the mission field. I think determined might be a better word. Besides, I had taught myself not to get excited over things, that way I don't get disappointed when things don't work out. ... What a sad outlook on life. Now I get excited to anticipate many things. Currently, I am super excited that next week is Thanksgiving. Time to spend with my family, enjoying great food and remembering everything I have to be grateful for. I am so excited for Black Friday I could bust! When we drove past the Home Depot today I was already looking out for those refrigerated-Matson containers that would be holding the Christmas tree will soon be standing in our front room. I've learned it's better to get excited and happy about things and life and face occasional disappointment then to always live in fear of disappointment.
***May 25, 2004 JOURNAL:From San Francisco
I didn't cry at the airport. I thought I would, but I guess because I didn't hug anyone, outside of my family, there was less of an emotional goodbye, or because I've been saying goodbye to people for the past two weeks. I'm almost surprised at how alright I am, maybe it just hasn't "sunk-in"yet.
Besides my own family, Greg Sessions and two others also came to see me off. I have gained a great appreciation for Greg. Especially for his spirit and his counsel. When he told he some of his fears, I emailed him my favorite talk by Sheri Dew about seeing the "Big Finish." He returned the favor of sorts at the airport. He gave me a talk by Elder Packer (The Candle of the Lord) and a letter of counsel to never settle for less than I deserve.
The plane is about to board and I'm still not excited, like I think should be. I know I have work to do. I know that work can and will only be accomplished with the help of and by the direction of the Lord. I am ready to work. I am ready to learn and to grow and to help those around me in anyway I can. I am as ready as I will ever be. I look forward to the experiences both good and bad that lay before me. I know that the spirit of the Lord is with me and I am not afraid. We'll see how long that lasts.
13 November 2012
I don't know if I was ever really excited to about getting to the MTC or even to the mission field. I think determined might be a better word. Besides, I had taught myself not to get excited over things, that way I don't get disappointed when things don't work out. ... What a sad outlook on life. Now I get excited to anticipate many things. Currently, I am super excited that next week is Thanksgiving. Time to spend with my family, enjoying great food and remembering everything I have to be grateful for. I am so excited for Black Friday I could bust! When we drove past the Home Depot today I was already looking out for those refrigerated-Matson containers that would be holding the Christmas tree will soon be standing in our front room. I've learned it's better to get excited and happy about things and life and face occasional disappointment then to always live in fear of disappointment.
Friday, November 9, 2012
Whats's more Important?
I am currently editing in html so I can sit next to Alessandra who is not feeling well at the moment.
***March 11, 2004 JOURNAL: Missions
I don't want people to make a big fuss over me. I'm scared. I was brought to the realization Monday that more than anything this mission will be about personal growth. I know it'll all turn out well, that it'll provide growth and experience that can't be gained anywhere else. But I'm scared and I'm no exactly sure why. It makes me feel emotional and makes me want to cry. I don't want them to make a big fuss over it on Sunday at the branch. I'm not gone yet and I'd rather the transition be smooth and not be a big shock next week, for my last week. There is still work that needs to be done in the branch.
Dad was telling me there's a lot of good I can do in the ward before I leave. Help build up the singles program there. I know it was selfish to think I'd get a break. The work goes on. It is always there - waiting for us to take the opportunity to be blessed
9 November 2012
I'm witting next to an awake sick child that is sucking on her thumb and pinching my arm. When Pwopwo is sick she finds it easiest to sleep right on someone rather than in her crib or in her own space. So for the better of the last few hours I have been helping her go back to sleep, helping Lloyd stay asleep and tending to my, thankfully, well infant client. About 10 minutes ago I finally gave her some medication. Which means naptime is over. But at least she feels better. What does that mean? It means the dishes are currently not washed, the house is somewhat in disarray, and the trash has not been taken out yet. Here's the thing though: in a few short years the house will be wholely clean everyday and all the time because my babies will have grown up and moved out and will not need me to hold them to sleep while they are sick. While it is important for the dishes to be wahsed and he house to be tidied and the trash to be taken out those things will not make up for missing out on spending precious time with my babies while they are with me. Not an all the time excuse, but enough reason for right now.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Gratitude
Do you know how many people would know if I skipped out on blogging for one day?
***JOURNAL: March 4, 2004
I'm grateful for this journal and I'm glad I'm writing again. It allows me to see progression in myself. It acts as a compilation of thoughts, quotes, ideas and letters. It is my space to think out loud which is necessary for me because I don't talk to very many people about that things that are bothering me. I've found I'm grateful for a lot of things. Rain, of course (whoo-hoo we're expecting another storm!) I'm grateful for the branch. Funny though, because I never wanted to go to the branch. I had already belonged to the singles ward in Oregon and wanted to be in a home ward over my breaks. I'm grateful for all the opportunities I've had to serve in the branch. I'm beginning to see how everything in my life fits together. I would never had made it to the University of Oregon if I had stayed at Nanakuli High. Kamehameha allowed an environment that would help me to grow in ways not possible anywhere else. I know it was not meant for me to go to any BYU campus, not that I wanted to either. I went to a BYU open house one year in high school, the speaker got up and said, "Church college is not for everyone. Just because you are a member of this church does not mean you need to attend BYU." I said, amen and was ready to leave. I thought Oregon fit me much better. I needed to be in a place that allowed me to make my own decisions, without so many straight out restrictions. A place where people din't know me yet. Somewhere that I could be myself without expectations. Overall, Oregon was a good experience for me. I met some great people and there are some memories I know I'll never forget. Leaving school early was necessary. I can see how I've grown in ways I never thought possible. I've collected traits, quirks, habits, and other stuff from the different places that I've been and the different people I've met. These are things I can keep with me forever. Long after I grow out of t-shirts and pens run out of ink. I'm grateful for all the things the Lord has provided for me - especially the people he has allowed me to meet. I feel I have reached a mini-climactic point in "The Book of Ari's Life." It's that point where you can see how everything you've read form the beginning is falling into place. You can see why certain decisions had to be made and why particular roads had to be taken. You can guess at what this should all resolve to, but you read on to find out how it all works out.
8 November 2012
It has been a marathon kind of day today. And in all things today, I am grateful for my husband. Especially on days like to day, I'm grateful I said yes and was temple ready when he was. Preach My Gospel talks about how the Lord is preparing us to meet specific people and preparing them to me us. I believe that was the case with Nake'u and me. He is everything I asked Heavenly Father to give me in an eternal companion and so much more. I love you, Nake'u Smith. Thank you for all you've done to make today easier than it would've been to take our two babies, and infant client to two doctors appointments where we were in each doctor's office for over an hour. Then cooking yummy get-better soup for all of us sicky-faces. "You're the best" doesn't even begin to describe.
***JOURNAL: March 4, 2004
I'm grateful for this journal and I'm glad I'm writing again. It allows me to see progression in myself. It acts as a compilation of thoughts, quotes, ideas and letters. It is my space to think out loud which is necessary for me because I don't talk to very many people about that things that are bothering me. I've found I'm grateful for a lot of things. Rain, of course (whoo-hoo we're expecting another storm!) I'm grateful for the branch. Funny though, because I never wanted to go to the branch. I had already belonged to the singles ward in Oregon and wanted to be in a home ward over my breaks. I'm grateful for all the opportunities I've had to serve in the branch. I'm beginning to see how everything in my life fits together. I would never had made it to the University of Oregon if I had stayed at Nanakuli High. Kamehameha allowed an environment that would help me to grow in ways not possible anywhere else. I know it was not meant for me to go to any BYU campus, not that I wanted to either. I went to a BYU open house one year in high school, the speaker got up and said, "Church college is not for everyone. Just because you are a member of this church does not mean you need to attend BYU." I said, amen and was ready to leave. I thought Oregon fit me much better. I needed to be in a place that allowed me to make my own decisions, without so many straight out restrictions. A place where people din't know me yet. Somewhere that I could be myself without expectations. Overall, Oregon was a good experience for me. I met some great people and there are some memories I know I'll never forget. Leaving school early was necessary. I can see how I've grown in ways I never thought possible. I've collected traits, quirks, habits, and other stuff from the different places that I've been and the different people I've met. These are things I can keep with me forever. Long after I grow out of t-shirts and pens run out of ink. I'm grateful for all the things the Lord has provided for me - especially the people he has allowed me to meet. I feel I have reached a mini-climactic point in "The Book of Ari's Life." It's that point where you can see how everything you've read form the beginning is falling into place. You can see why certain decisions had to be made and why particular roads had to be taken. You can guess at what this should all resolve to, but you read on to find out how it all works out.
8 November 2012
It has been a marathon kind of day today. And in all things today, I am grateful for my husband. Especially on days like to day, I'm grateful I said yes and was temple ready when he was. Preach My Gospel talks about how the Lord is preparing us to meet specific people and preparing them to me us. I believe that was the case with Nake'u and me. He is everything I asked Heavenly Father to give me in an eternal companion and so much more. I love you, Nake'u Smith. Thank you for all you've done to make today easier than it would've been to take our two babies, and infant client to two doctors appointments where we were in each doctor's office for over an hour. Then cooking yummy get-better soup for all of us sicky-faces. "You're the best" doesn't even begin to describe.
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Uh, the time I wanted to give up on house chores
Some personal study notes. I noticed I was not very good at dating this material. It is all from January - February 2004
*** PERSONAL STUDY
HOPE - A state of longing for or anticipating something good
HOPE IN CHRIST - An assurance that a longing for or an anticipation of eternal life will be realized
PEACE - A cessation of conflict or turmoil, a tranquil state
PEACE IN CHRIST - That tranquility of mind and soul which comes with a brightness of hope in Christ
REST - An escape from activity or use of mental and physical energy
REST OF THE LORD - To gain a perfect knowledge of God's work in this life and to enter into the fullness of the glory of God, either in this life or the next
***2/4/04 PERSONAL STUDY: Alma 22-29
-to receive eternal life we must repent of our sins, be baptized and have faith in the words of Christ
-the Amalakites and the the Amulonites did not join the church because their hearts were hardened against the truth ... having once known the truth and had already chosen not to believe
-Evidence of true conversion of the Lamanites: 1. did not want to go to war for fear of breaking the commandments of God. 2. Had a testimony of the mercy of God. 3. Held true to their word and died for their beliefs
*** PERSONAL STUDY: Ch. 32 Formula for Developing a Testimony
-be humble --> learn wisdom
-become humble -->repentance -->find mercy -->endure to the end -->blessings
-have faith -->be believing -->be baptized -->great blessings
You must sincerely believe, then continuously cultivate that belief. Scripture study builds faith: Bruce R. McConkie, "Those who study, ponder and pray about the scriptures, seeking to understand their deep and hidden meanings, receive from time to time great outpourings of light and knowledge from the Holy spirit. ... a sudden rush of ideas."
***PERSONAL STUDY: Alma 34-35
If the atonement had not been made, all mankind would unavoidably perish. All would be lost.
7 November 2012
I tried to post this blog earlier this morning, but I hadn't decided on what to write in for today's journal entry. Then I had an epiphinistic moment of rather self-depressic proportion. I had my list of to-do's for the day ready to go. I try to to-do list myself everyday, but it was especially important today because I am in charge of the mutual night tonight up at the church with the Young Women. I was trying, as efficiently as possible with two young children and my infant client, to make my way down my to-do list. Wednesday is surfaces day and I meant to steam the downstairs floor. We own a Shark Vac then Steam, which I have loved since we bought our first one two years ago. But for the second time in two years it broke a month outside of it's manufacturer's warranty. And I had just started steaming the floor. I wasn't even 5% done. Grrrr. It's moments like those where I generally choose to throw the internal adult temper-tantrum and put myself in time out. I mean, why plan out my day for success when something as unpredictable as steam-vac breaking down was going to ruin my chances? Uh. After that all I wanted to do was shut down, watch tv with the babies and eat every chocolaty- sweet thing I could get my hands on. I generally don't need to be depressed or sad to indulge in chocolaty- goodness, but it makes me momentarily feel better. Instead, I allowed myself a short, mental break, took my big-girl pill (which may or may not have been a chocolate treat ...) and decided that I can't let one hiccup in my day shut down all production. So, it wasn't meant for me to get the downstairs floors all steamed before dinner time. So, the couches will stay stacked on the one side until later tonight when I replace our steamer. So, what? Let it go and move on. Uh, uh, uh. Tough lesson there. Now, onto other productive things that I can scratch off my to-do list and still feel successful today.
*** PERSONAL STUDY
HOPE - A state of longing for or anticipating something good
HOPE IN CHRIST - An assurance that a longing for or an anticipation of eternal life will be realized
PEACE - A cessation of conflict or turmoil, a tranquil state
PEACE IN CHRIST - That tranquility of mind and soul which comes with a brightness of hope in Christ
REST - An escape from activity or use of mental and physical energy
REST OF THE LORD - To gain a perfect knowledge of God's work in this life and to enter into the fullness of the glory of God, either in this life or the next
***2/4/04 PERSONAL STUDY: Alma 22-29
-to receive eternal life we must repent of our sins, be baptized and have faith in the words of Christ
-the Amalakites and the the Amulonites did not join the church because their hearts were hardened against the truth ... having once known the truth and had already chosen not to believe
-Evidence of true conversion of the Lamanites: 1. did not want to go to war for fear of breaking the commandments of God. 2. Had a testimony of the mercy of God. 3. Held true to their word and died for their beliefs
*** PERSONAL STUDY: Ch. 32 Formula for Developing a Testimony
-be humble --> learn wisdom
-become humble -->repentance -->find mercy -->endure to the end -->blessings
-have faith -->be believing -->be baptized -->great blessings
You must sincerely believe, then continuously cultivate that belief. Scripture study builds faith: Bruce R. McConkie, "Those who study, ponder and pray about the scriptures, seeking to understand their deep and hidden meanings, receive from time to time great outpourings of light and knowledge from the Holy spirit. ... a sudden rush of ideas."
***PERSONAL STUDY: Alma 34-35
If the atonement had not been made, all mankind would unavoidably perish. All would be lost.
7 November 2012
I tried to post this blog earlier this morning, but I hadn't decided on what to write in for today's journal entry. Then I had an epiphinistic moment of rather self-depressic proportion. I had my list of to-do's for the day ready to go. I try to to-do list myself everyday, but it was especially important today because I am in charge of the mutual night tonight up at the church with the Young Women. I was trying, as efficiently as possible with two young children and my infant client, to make my way down my to-do list. Wednesday is surfaces day and I meant to steam the downstairs floor. We own a Shark Vac then Steam, which I have loved since we bought our first one two years ago. But for the second time in two years it broke a month outside of it's manufacturer's warranty. And I had just started steaming the floor. I wasn't even 5% done. Grrrr. It's moments like those where I generally choose to throw the internal adult temper-tantrum and put myself in time out. I mean, why plan out my day for success when something as unpredictable as steam-vac breaking down was going to ruin my chances? Uh. After that all I wanted to do was shut down, watch tv with the babies and eat every chocolaty- sweet thing I could get my hands on. I generally don't need to be depressed or sad to indulge in chocolaty- goodness, but it makes me momentarily feel better. Instead, I allowed myself a short, mental break, took my big-girl pill (which may or may not have been a chocolate treat ...) and decided that I can't let one hiccup in my day shut down all production. So, it wasn't meant for me to get the downstairs floors all steamed before dinner time. So, the couches will stay stacked on the one side until later tonight when I replace our steamer. So, what? Let it go and move on. Uh, uh, uh. Tough lesson there. Now, onto other productive things that I can scratch off my to-do list and still feel successful today.
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
Notes from Sunday Lessons and a Lesson on Discipline
*** 2/8/04 SUNDAY LESSON NOTES: Walking in the Path That Leads to Eternal Life
John 7:17, "If any man will do his will, he shall know of the doctrine, whether it be of God, or whether I speak of myself."
Lessons Learned: 1. Go and do what you're supposed to do, then you will know of it's truth. 2. It is our duty to keep the commandments of God. 3. If you are doing what's right you won't be led astray
***2/15/04 SUNDAY LESSON NOTES: Persistence
My Def: The act of continually trying at something until you succeed at it or become so tired of it that you give up.
Emerson: "That which we persist in doing becomes easier for us to do - not that the nature of the thing has changed, but that our power to do is increased."
Persistence in our goals and desires, helps us to be the architect of our own lives.
***2/22/04 SUNDAY LESSON NOTES: Being Grateful
When we give thanks for all things we see the eternal perspective
Doctrine and Covenants 138:12 "And there were gathered together in one place an innumerable company of the spirits of the just, who had been faithful in the testimony of Jesus while they lived in mortality;"
Doctrine and Covenants 138:30 "But behold, from among the righteous, he organized his forces and appointed messengers, clothed with power and authority, and commissioned them to go forth and carry the light of the gospel to them that were in darkness, even to all the spirits of men; and thus was the gospel preached to the dead."
Doctrine and Covenants 59:7 "Thou shalt thank the Lord thy God in all things."
6 November 2012
Some months ago I was really having trouble keeping up with the two kiddies, my business and cleaning the house. I had gotten into the habit of thinking that everyone else's house is always the "pink of perfection" and our home is the only cluttered home that would never make magazine pictures. I had a cleaning schedule I was good at following pre-Alessandra. But post-second-baby I lost the schedule and had fallen out of following it so I couldn't remember it
Pinterest showed me a schedule someone else swore up and down by, and since it's easier to be told what to do than to make decisions about boring things, I've been following it ever since. Here's the thing, though, the cleaning schedule:
Monday - All Laundry, Tidy up around the house, sweep/vac main floors
Tuesday - Bathrooms
Wednesday - Surfaces, Windows and All Floors
Thursday - Organization project
Friday - Tidy and sweep/vac main floors
is easy to follow but useless if not followed. Yesterday I attempted to get back into the discipline of washing, folding and putting away all laundry in one day. I was great (much better than usual) at getting all the laundry washed and dried. I folded most, but not all. I did put away what I folded, so that was good. It took an incredible amount of discipline to get multiple loads of clothes washed and dried. I had set the timer on my phone each time so I wouldn't lose track of the time and still had to convince myself to put down what I was doing each time to take care of the laundry.
The lesson - life takes discipline. Self-Mastery and discipline.
Saturday, November 3, 2012
Seeing the End from the Beginning
***February 10, 2004 JOURNAL: Scared and Confused
I must need to go (on a mission.) I can't remember my brother coming up against troubles. But then again, he didn't tell me everything. I'm trying to understand why it would be so hard for me to go. Satan's working on me and it's a struggle not to give in. It's especially hard because I can't see it - I don't know who this story is supposed to end. I can't imagine this entire mission won't be a struggle. I know it won't be worth my while unless I do my best and basically work myself until I "die." And when I come back, then what? I can't see it. I must need to go. If not why would it be so hard? Why would there be so much opposition? I need a hug. I need to know that everything will work out. But, I guess, sometimes you have to take a few steps into the darkness before you can see the light. The reward doesn't come until after a trial of your faith. I just wish my faith didn't need to be tested. I wish I could see it.
3 November 2012
If I could see where I am now compared to where I was then, I would do it over a thousand times.
Last night we spent the greater part of our night preparing for a family fun fest up at the church today. I learn more and more about relationships everyday I am married to my awesome husband. Some of my favorite times spent with my husband is when we are working together on the same project. I have learned that marriage and relationships are as much about learning to work together as much as it is about how happy I feel when I get to sit next to him and hold his hand. It's as much about thinking about spending together forever, as it is enjoying the present. I find when my focus changes from the me-monster to our family and our lives together, my day is much more enjoyable. It is very easy for me to get caught up in how clean my house isn't and how much I feel my kids don't listen to the things I ask them to do. But, when I take the time to enjoy where I am in life today all those concerns about my homemaking skills and my parenting skills and my business skills fade away to joy and happiness.
I must need to go (on a mission.) I can't remember my brother coming up against troubles. But then again, he didn't tell me everything. I'm trying to understand why it would be so hard for me to go. Satan's working on me and it's a struggle not to give in. It's especially hard because I can't see it - I don't know who this story is supposed to end. I can't imagine this entire mission won't be a struggle. I know it won't be worth my while unless I do my best and basically work myself until I "die." And when I come back, then what? I can't see it. I must need to go. If not why would it be so hard? Why would there be so much opposition? I need a hug. I need to know that everything will work out. But, I guess, sometimes you have to take a few steps into the darkness before you can see the light. The reward doesn't come until after a trial of your faith. I just wish my faith didn't need to be tested. I wish I could see it.
3 November 2012
If I could see where I am now compared to where I was then, I would do it over a thousand times.
Last night we spent the greater part of our night preparing for a family fun fest up at the church today. I learn more and more about relationships everyday I am married to my awesome husband. Some of my favorite times spent with my husband is when we are working together on the same project. I have learned that marriage and relationships are as much about learning to work together as much as it is about how happy I feel when I get to sit next to him and hold his hand. It's as much about thinking about spending together forever, as it is enjoying the present. I find when my focus changes from the me-monster to our family and our lives together, my day is much more enjoyable. It is very easy for me to get caught up in how clean my house isn't and how much I feel my kids don't listen to the things I ask them to do. But, when I take the time to enjoy where I am in life today all those concerns about my homemaking skills and my parenting skills and my business skills fade away to joy and happiness.
Friday, November 2, 2012
Lesser known truths about growing up
It should be noted that my journals used to be kept in three sections (a 3-section notebook). The first section for notes on Sunday and other church meetings. The second section for notes on personal scripture study and institute classes. The last section for journal. For each journal entry there is a specific title. I don't know when or why I started doing this, but I did. I never held myself to writing everyday, but I tried for at least once a week. The entries I share here may come from any of the sections, and I'll preface each entry.
I have decided to skip the rest of the month of January for all entries. There was nothing terribly exciting in the two notes sections. As for the journal section, it was mostly complaints about work and other people. I will note that in that month I learned about the passing of a friend and mentor, Benjamin Hoke.
***February 4, 2004 JOURNAL: First Day of No Work
I can't say that I'm not happy. I was feeling like some old person that just retired. Now I have a lot of "extra time" to do things I want to do. Among which includes taking better care of myself, cleaning up the house, catching up on church stuff and catching up on reading.
Sunday I had a birthday interview with the branch president. He started talking about going on a mission. Then he asked me what would happen if I were to get married first. I blanked. I didn't what to say. Then I told him my decision was that I should go. He said that was good and reminded me the final decision was up to me. I told him this was not helpful. With difficult decisions it's easier to be told what to do. Then, if it doesn't work out, someone else takes the blame. But being questioned that like makes me wonder what I should do.
2 November 2012
That lesson about being told what to do is easier that deciding for myself is one of those lesser known truths about growing up. The older I get the more I have to rely on my own decisions that the decisions of others. That ties in with another lesson about growing up I learned, which is: If decide you want to accomplish something then you need to do the work!
I was once taught (although I can't remember the source) that if I couldn't keep my own room clean, how could I possibly keep a whole house clean? While I was not good at keeping my room clean as a child ... I shared a small room with my three siblings, and if they didn't clean up their stuff, why should I clean up my stuff? ... I was much better as a teen when we moved and I we each had our own room space. What they didn't teach me was that cleaning a house, with young children, takes work. If something is dropped on the ground, it will not magically re-appear in the place to which it belongs. If the dishes are left in the sink over-night, they will not be cleaned and put away in the morning when I wake up. If a child goes to sleep dirty, without a bath, they will still be dirty in the morning, but will still give you smiles. Life takes work, little by little, day by day until the whole house is clean (which is yet to be realized since the birth of Lloyd).
I can't say that I'm not happy. I was feeling like some old person that just retired. Now I have a lot of "extra time" to do things I want to do. Among which includes taking better care of myself, cleaning up the house, catching up on church stuff and catching up on reading.
Sunday I had a birthday interview with the branch president. He started talking about going on a mission. Then he asked me what would happen if I were to get married first. I blanked. I didn't what to say. Then I told him my decision was that I should go. He said that was good and reminded me the final decision was up to me. I told him this was not helpful. With difficult decisions it's easier to be told what to do. Then, if it doesn't work out, someone else takes the blame. But being questioned that like makes me wonder what I should do.
2 November 2012
That lesson about being told what to do is easier that deciding for myself is one of those lesser known truths about growing up. The older I get the more I have to rely on my own decisions that the decisions of others. That ties in with another lesson about growing up I learned, which is: If decide you want to accomplish something then you need to do the work!
I was once taught (although I can't remember the source) that if I couldn't keep my own room clean, how could I possibly keep a whole house clean? While I was not good at keeping my room clean as a child ... I shared a small room with my three siblings, and if they didn't clean up their stuff, why should I clean up my stuff? ... I was much better as a teen when we moved and I we each had our own room space. What they didn't teach me was that cleaning a house, with young children, takes work. If something is dropped on the ground, it will not magically re-appear in the place to which it belongs. If the dishes are left in the sink over-night, they will not be cleaned and put away in the morning when I wake up. If a child goes to sleep dirty, without a bath, they will still be dirty in the morning, but will still give you smiles. Life takes work, little by little, day by day until the whole house is clean (which is yet to be realized since the birth of Lloyd).
Thursday, November 1, 2012
A Project
I decided I wanted a way to accomplish two tasks. First I wanted to be able to digitize my journals from the time I turned in my mission papers to just after returning home from serving a mission. Second I wanted to be able to post real experiences about my life now. Each of my posts will contain an abridged (only the important and relevant information) but otherwise unedited version of a past journal and a current life experience.
***January 1, 2004
It feels kind of weird starting up this "journal" idea again. I guess I'll just be "shaking hands" for a while - feeling things out. It's like I'm not comfortable with being open with the thoughts and ideas that travel back and forth across my mind. As if putting them down on paper somehow makes it real and alive. At the very least it makes them, these thoughts, available for future reference.
I feel conflicted. My heart isn't making it very easy to live. In my mind I know I need to focus on going on a mission. But my heart is very scared. My brain won't ever understand my heart. It has all become very complicated. I think I make it that way though. I know things can be very simple if I let them. And I think I am finally coming to understand that concept. Life doesn't have to be any harder then I make it for myself. And I know, I know, that I need to be able to trust my heart and with that let go of the insecurities I conjure up for myself in my mind.
1 November 2012
I had been considering working on this blog for a few days now. This morning I got an email from wordpress saying that November is National post on your blog month or something like that. It seemed like the arrow that was pointing in the direction of start here Kimosbe. I would like to say that in the hour it took me to start up this blog I have let my kids run a muck of the house and will probably spend the rest of the day cleaning up as repentance for letting them play unattended. Luckily I checked on them while they were playing in Lloyd's room, because they were sitting in the window again. I reminded them to stay off the window sill because if they fell out of the window, they would fall off the house. They would be hurt and I would be sad. That explanation seemed enough for them to stay out of the window area with out unnecessarily raising my voice or making threats on snacks and movies.
Thursday is organize something in the house day on my cleaning schedule. Today was supposed to be the day I focused cleaning out Alessandra's room, but it looks like I will end up being a home-recuperation day from too much Halloween fun yesterday.
***January 1, 2004
It feels kind of weird starting up this "journal" idea again. I guess I'll just be "shaking hands" for a while - feeling things out. It's like I'm not comfortable with being open with the thoughts and ideas that travel back and forth across my mind. As if putting them down on paper somehow makes it real and alive. At the very least it makes them, these thoughts, available for future reference.
I feel conflicted. My heart isn't making it very easy to live. In my mind I know I need to focus on going on a mission. But my heart is very scared. My brain won't ever understand my heart. It has all become very complicated. I think I make it that way though. I know things can be very simple if I let them. And I think I am finally coming to understand that concept. Life doesn't have to be any harder then I make it for myself. And I know, I know, that I need to be able to trust my heart and with that let go of the insecurities I conjure up for myself in my mind.
1 November 2012
I had been considering working on this blog for a few days now. This morning I got an email from wordpress saying that November is National post on your blog month or something like that. It seemed like the arrow that was pointing in the direction of start here Kimosbe. I would like to say that in the hour it took me to start up this blog I have let my kids run a muck of the house and will probably spend the rest of the day cleaning up as repentance for letting them play unattended. Luckily I checked on them while they were playing in Lloyd's room, because they were sitting in the window again. I reminded them to stay off the window sill because if they fell out of the window, they would fall off the house. They would be hurt and I would be sad. That explanation seemed enough for them to stay out of the window area with out unnecessarily raising my voice or making threats on snacks and movies.
Thursday is organize something in the house day on my cleaning schedule. Today was supposed to be the day I focused cleaning out Alessandra's room, but it looks like I will end up being a home-recuperation day from too much Halloween fun yesterday.
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